Hey ya'll(:

Yesterday was the Ngee Ann Poly Open, a small competition organized by Ngee Ann Poly, and there happened to be just 2 schools bowling, Ngee Ann Poly and Republic Poly. But it was quite fun though. And I didn’t expect to win anything out of it because it’s a mixed competition, so I expected the guys to take up at least the top 5 positions. But I happened to be 3^rd after my handicap of 60 pins was added in. otherwise I would have been 7^th position with an average of 192.17.

I was bowling a 220, 160, and then a 149 for the first 3 games respectively and I was getting pissed off. I didn’t expect a carry down in the lane oiling and was switching ball here and there. Then the 4^th game was 182. On the 5^th and 6^th game, I gave up fighting and decided to just read my newly bought Bible. I then bowled a 221 on both the 5^th and 6^th game. God had helped me bring peace to my mind. I realized I have been thinking too much, and the Bible was the source of peace that brought my mind away from bowling. I knew what I had to do on lane, but I was thinking too much in the bowler’s area after each shot. It is indeed true, what was mentioned in Proverbs 3:5-6:

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight”

I knew what I had to do on lanes, and the only challenge was to trust myself it sending the ball to the intended line. I kept getting 5 strikes in a row, and the only times I made a mistake was the times I didn’t trust myself at the point of release and did last minute minor adjustments when I was releasing the ball. The Lord was there to guide my troubled heart and mind. It is also true indeed, what was mentioned in Philippians 4:6-7:

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Everyone in the team knows what I am like when I am pissed when I face difficulties. I was trying so hard follow Philippians 2:3-4:

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”

I was still cheering my teammates and my lane-mate, Sandy Tan while I was frustrated with myself. Thank God for such concerned and thoughtful friends, they were trying to cheer me up and comfort me. Even Sandy Tan was trying to cheer me up. If only I knew how to suppress my anger, or at least not let it show. Now that I have found a way to bring peace to myself, I will carry on using this method in any other competitions. And that is, to read the word of God when I face difficulties.

Well, it has been a long time since my last entry. So bear with me for this post, because there are many things that I have learnt over this long period of time of NOT blogging. Haha.

What I have learnt most importantly is that, this Sportswoman of the Year thing isn’t good for me after all, since it affected my spiritual life and mindset in a bad way. I have been constantly pushing myself in bowling and have almost neglected God totally. But thank God for the Holy Spirit, I still search God’s words for answers. There was one day I just flipped through the Bible, and in a second, I was caught by Philippians 2:3-8:

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:

Who, being in the very nature of God,

Did not consider equality with God something to be grasped,

But made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant,

Being made in human likeness,

And being found in appearance as a man,

He humbled himself and became obedient to death—

Even death on a cross!”

So what if I am the Sportswoman of the Year? I’m no different from the other bowlers. And the other bowlers are better than me in their own ways. Like, better learning attitudes in bowling, better anger and temperament management, a more positive attitude, and better ways at handling failures.

I had been struggling a little bit in bowling after we changed training grounds, and I was so frustrated with the lanes. My coach could see that I was struggling, and kept nagging at me with my mistakes. ARRGH!! This is so like SBF. But I tried to be tolerant because after all, he may have seen some mistakes that I made that pulled down my performance.

After I got better, and started scoring averages of 190 and above again, I still got irritating naggings from the coach and was even compared with another bowler who recently improved and started doing very well! Now this is sooooo like SBF man! ARRGH!! I hate that. That was precisely what made me demoralized and want to give up bowling in the first place.

But, after I came across the verse in Philippians, I realized that I haven’t been humble these days and actually thought that I was something. I have been working hard to achieve my selfish ambitions of maintaining number one! And I didn’t have humility in me, considering others better than myself. I looked only to my own interest, (which was tackling the lanes and getting my game and form back) and totally ignored the rest of my teammates who tried so hard to cheer me up.

Even if I am actually something in people’s eyes, I should instill humility into myself and see others better than me. I am only the Sportswoman of the Year and it’s just for the year 2009-2010, but Jesus is God in the past, present and future. I have had failures and was nothing in people’s eyes, but God is perfect and have never failed and has been feared of by everyone on earth.

Yet, He still came into this world as a mere human being who could feel hungry and thirsty, and could submit to death when He didn’t need to. He took in great amount of pain for His people when His own people were the ones that didn’t believe He was God their Father, and found all ways to send Him to His death.

Galatians 6:3-4 says “If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, for each one should carry his own load.”

This verse reminds me of an analogy my mentor once told me. If one day God sets only one commandment for you that is “Thou shall jump so high that thou touches the moon” and you could only jump a meter high. Then one day, someone comes along beside you and tried to jump as well but could only jump half a meter high, you start laughing and mocking him. Isn’t it STUPID??? Both of you are equal failures who are way WAYYY too far from the mark God has set for you.

In the same way, we are not perfect and cannot achieve the best which is perfection. We can only achieve the best that is possible within our human capabilities. That makes us failures in a way that we cannot achieve perfection, and we are comparing ourselves with others who fail? Hence, the best is to have humility and consider others better than ourselves and look not only to your interests but the interests of others. Then you can gain respect from others.

I heard a relevant sermon last Sunday in church, and James 1:2-4 was used: “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.” Pastor Steven said that trials and difficulties are always coming our way to shape and mold us into something better. Hence, we must embrace them.

Being in a church full of people who have studied overseas or have gone overseas for some reason, I feel the urge to go back to America. I feel happy with the memories that I had. But I wish I could go back again. I haven’t had any chances to use my accent because there was no need for me to converse with an American anymore. But I was glad I still have it in me, because it sure made English so much easier. However, with these people who had gone there, I feel annoyed in some ways.

First of all, they’ll always talk about what they had experienced there, which was fine. But I recently came across some youths from church with American accents. Not that I had a problem with it, because I was like them when I first came back, still adapting after coming back to Singapore. It was what they said that made me super annoyed with them. They kept mocking Singapore, but I’m not complaining about this because I’m patriotic. I’m not.

People who had stayed in America for a couple of years, I noticed, would tend to say that Singapore sucks. They would make fun of how the Singaporeans speak, and how some aunties would dress, and the mannerism of the people here. They would complain about the culture and several other things.

On that day when I was hanging out with some of them, I got super annoyed and was thinking to myself: Singapore is not very good in certain ways, but they have improved greatly over the years. I like living in Singapore because it is a small country that is VERY convenient. Places here are easily accessible. You can hardly get lost around here.

If let’s say you can’t get from somewhere in Queenstown to Seng Kang, just take any bus around you. They’re bound to get to an MRT station. And from there, you can easily make your way to Seng Kang by MRT. It’s as easy as that. I remember when I was 10 to 13 years of age, my mother had to drive for 30mins to the bowling alley every day of the week so that I can practice. Although of course, being a small country is also a bad thing due to its chances of becoming boring. But you can’t blame it for its natural size. It’s like blaming me for being small.

I like it here also because it’s rather cosmopolitan. It very well developed, and I loved places like Vivo City, Orchard Road, and our very own airport. However I only go there like, once in 3 months or less than that. It’s so different from the town I lived in back in America, although the town was more relaxing and simple because it was a country side. So I smell cow poo every morning in the winter since the farm was just 100 meters from my backyard.

On top of that, Singapore is so much more secure than America. There is better control there and there are less criminal cases, probably because there is a smaller population here. But the government here is quite good as well. At least we have a minister mentor with a good foresight.

I probably don’t understand their complaints because we lived in different parts of America. But they still shouldn’t be complaining so much about their country of origin and be so smug about their accents. If it weren’t for their parents who went there to work and decided to bring the whole family along, they wouldn’t have their accents and their beautiful experiences in the first place. Are they being smug because they think they’re different and special apart from their peers?

Of course, there are some things here that Singapore can’t compare to in America, for example, the mannerism of the people. But I could see that being improved on in Singapore. And of course, the vulgarities in America are not as much as Singaporean youths think. So I hope they would stop mixing so many vulgarities into their speech because they sound freaking ridiculous, like they’re not educated enough to know many alternate vocabularies to use for description. You know who you are:)

Of course, there are more “unglam” Singaporean habits, which I’d rather not mention. But the bottom line is that Singapore is their homeland. Each country has their pros and con, and one is just better than the other in their own ways.

I dunno... i just feel like shouting "screw you!!"

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But i can't...

Ugh... i hate it when i get pissed at someone. YOU THINK YOU'RE THAT GOOD? YOU THINK I CAN'T MATCH UP TO YOU???
Take a better look at yourself. You're a joke.
**** ***...

Haiz... Pray for me for peace in mind and heart.

Phillipians 4:6-7, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

Yo! It’s been awhile since I blogged. Haha:D
Well anyway, back to living for Christ. I mentioned my dear teammates in this post too:)

I received a book from my pastor for youth Sunday. It’s titled, “The Life You’ve Always Wanted”. It mentioned the transformation of Christians. We know that we are called to come out and be separate from the world as our faith and commitment to Christ makes us different from others. However, we are always looking for external methods to achieve this by setting boundary markers.

In the first century, there were laws focusing on dietary laws, circumcision, and the Sabbath. These practices gave them an identity that separated them from the outsiders. However, the heart of the law was “The Lord is our God, the Lord alone. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your might.” These superficial practices enabled the insiders to distinguish the insiders and outsiders of the family of God. And the insiders became proud and judgmental towards the outsiders.

The message by Jesus was not to simply conform to the religious subculture, but to be transformed into a “new creation”. Jesus focused more on the center, the heart of spiritual life, instead of the superficial boundaries.

In Matthew chapter 12, Jesus’s disciples were hungry and picked some heads of grain and ate them. Upon seeing this, the Pharisees said to Jesus, “Look! Your disciples are doing what is unlawful on the Sabbath.” In Matthew 12:6-7, Jesus replied “I tell you that one greater than the temple is here. If you had known what these words mean, ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice’, you would not have condemned the innocent.”

In Matthew 15:2, the Pharisees and teachers of the law came to Jesus and asked, “Why do your disciples break the tradition of the elders? They don’t wash their hands before they eat!” Jesus replied in Matthew 15:3, “And why do you break the command of God for the sake of your tradition?”

Throughout the gospel, Jesus has turned prostitutes and tax collectors towards the kingdom of God, but the Pharisees and teachers of the law were stubborn and doubted Jesus. Matthew 21:31-32, Jesus told the Pharisees and teachers of the law, “I tell you the truth, the tax collectors and the prostitutes are entering the kingdom of God ahead of you. For John came to you to show you the way of righteousness, and you did not believe him, but the tax collectors and the prostitutes did. And even after you saw this, you did not repent and believe him.”

Hence, as the author of “The Life You’ve Always Wanted” wrote, this is the great irony of his day: the “righteous” were more damaged by their righteousness than the sinners were by their sins. And just as the author wrote, “it is possible to think that we are becoming more spiritual when in fact, we are only becoming more smug and judgmental”. This is what a quote was referring to as, “a good man in the worst sense of the word”.

In this book, someone once asked the author whether he thought that the church where he worked might be wordly. The person asked “Well, you use drama, and people are used to that in the world. And you play contemporary music just like they're used to hearing. So how will they know you’re any different? And everybody knows that as Christians, we’re supposed to be different from people in the world…”

Seems like Christians get confused with what Jesus said about “being part of the world but not of the world”, me included (hehe…). We are told not to conform to the world, but we always think that we should not follow the trend of the world. For example, the disapproval of rock music for singing praises during worship. We are only told in Romans 12:2 to “be transformed by the renewing of your mind”. Of course, there are practices that should be carried out like in Ephesians 5:18 “do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery”. Although that doesn’t mean we can’t totally drink. It’s just that we must not get drunk.

However, this superficiality does not only apply to Christians. I’ve ever come across non-Christians who are so “righteous” that they actually look down upon others. You’d have to admit, all of us are judgmental, quick to stereotype. We may think that those who can’t speak fluent English but speak fluent Singlish are “gangster-ish”, when in fact, they’re probably the nicest people. I learned that from my dear teammates whom I love ever so much. The smug, artificial friends I had were those who think they’re so “cultured”.

Well, we are all guilty of being artificial, doing and saying things that we think a spiritual person is supposed to say. Pride is a potential problem for those who take spiritual growth seriously. Pray that God will pull us back from that. And I thank God that I am able to share this with you all.

This is just for a CE activity for school (due to CE talks being postponed) :

Throughout the years since probably during the cavemen times, technology has helped human beings greatly in carrying out tasks, discovering science and ways to improve our lifestyles. Technology has almost always made work easier for us.

Today, as a student, technology is important for our education as there are many websites online that we can use for resources and references. Besides education purposes, technology can also provide us with entertainment with applications like iTunes or Windows Media Player. Technology can serve as a platform for communication for socializing purposes as well, with the use of MSN Messenger that is frequently used in school. It can also be used for file sharing which is useful for the learning system in RP where students learn together from one another.

As a student in RP, I feel like this is the future where everyone uses computers. On top of that, the whole school has access to wireless network that allows us to have access to the internet wherever we go around the school campus. Hence, Technology provides convenience to not only us students, but to everyone else.

Everything seems so advanced to me and hardly any paper is being used in class, which seems quite environmentally friendly to me. Only once in a blue moon do we use mahjong papers for class work or presentation. In fact, it seems to me that technology can actually be used to reduce the harm being done to this earth.

I think it’s quite good that we are making use of technology to assist us in our learning. At the same time, we learn something about the technologies that we use. This way, we will be more IT savvy and that will be very helpful to us when we enter the working world in the future. Being IT savvy is very important because almost all jobs require you to use a computer.